...A theology forum might have slightly less blind thinkers than a christian one, you see.
I see a bias you might want to consider and work on. Everyone with a context (and everyone has one) has a blind spot, depending on your perspective.
The forum isn't what I expected, but it may be better.
It has good and bad days and interesting, engaging people, along with people bent on standing in the public square, loudly, with no intent to do more than sneer and shout. And that's from either side of the coin.
So, I'm a high schooler of abnormal thinking, and have found it more and more difficult to believe in God, especially the one of the Bible.
Then I'd say something else is driving you. It's no more or less difficult to believe in God. Probability doesn't play into it. And you either have faith in God or you don't, since that faith is an expression of love and trust. Those two things don't come with reservation. You don't "mostly" love someone or trust them "now and then."
I really don't want to lose the gift the Bible promises, and now I rely on another of its promises that those who seek him will find him.
The real gift of God is in relation and its impact on your daily life and spiritual maturation.
The evidence against Him seems huge, but I lay my last vestiges of hope in you guys (not to sound dramatic).
What evidence against? That the rain falls on the just and unjust alike? That there's suffering in a world of will? Or perhaps the larger suffering of nature that sees birth defects cancers in play. Suffering in all its forms gives and has given numerous people a great deal of trouble over the history of considering this problem. There are any number of answers you might find more or less satisfying, but it will come back, as it always must, to your foundation, your context.
Regardless, I've promised myself to always keep hoping and searching (though never suspending reason) for God throughout my life, in faith in this promise. I'm here to see how much you guys might help in said search.
I wasn't really where you are at your age, being a confirmed atheist at that point in my life and for some time thereafter...but I was searching for as much of the truth about life and the best context for being that I could wrap my noggin around. It eventually led to a surprising conversion...you appear to be ahead of my understanding at your age in your focus and openness to God. Perhaps you won't have so very far to go then. I'll add whatever I can to assist you in whatever way I can.
I assume that I won't need to account for all the sources of my disbelief in one post, nor give my life's story, so I'll stop the intro here.
No, you have this part right. Take your time. There are a great many people here with a great deal of experience, education, and patience...and there are others who...but you'll figure them out for yourself in short enough order.
Welcome. :e4e: As for reading...I'd say Lewis and Peck are fine starting points. They're accessible authors who are more interested in a good conversation with their reader than in making cold academic points that require a great breadth of additional reading. M. Scott Peck wrote "The Road Less Traveled" just as he was transitioning into Christian awareness. A good read. His "People of the Lie" is a fine study of evil...Lewis' "Mere Christianity" is a worthwhile intro.
If you like philosophical leanings, try Boethius and "The Consolation of Philosophy". "The Practice of the Presence of God", available online for free, is another interesting study in a life aimed at relation with God. It's very short, but has a good bit of worthwhile advice in it.