Christian Homeschoolers Sell Daughter in Arranged Marriage

[Granite]

How can you deny that's true?

I went to public school and saw that and more.

Then it sounds like you went to a crappy school. You could find all of the above in the right (or, ya know, wrong) parochial school.

 

[Jose Fly]

Yeah, they must've gone to the really cool high schools where everyone had sex...as opposed to, ya know, being an awkward and sexless teenager.:chuckle:

One of the things about living where I do, is the talk radio circuit includes a lot of far-right Christian programs (some local, some not). Right now, I can't tell if they really are this crazy, or if they're just competing for notoriety by being deliberately crazier than the last guy.

Either way, they have a surprising number of listeners who lap it all up like thirsty dogs.

 

[Jose Fly]

How can you deny that's true?

I went to public school and saw that and more.

Of course. Both my kids go to a public school and it's awesome. They're straight-A students, have great friends, have wonderful and caring teachers, and even the principals and counselors are great people. My high school was much the same.

OTOH, some of us knew that if you wanted to party and score with a girl, your best bet was to get invited to a party thrown by kids from any of the religious schools. They were always the wildest kids, probably because that's where parents with money sent 'em when they started getting into trouble.

 

[elohiym]

Of course. Both my kids go to a public school and it's awesome. They're straight-A students, have great friends, have wonderful and caring teachers, and even the principals and counselors are great people. My high school was much the same.

Well, other people have to live in a different world than you. Please show them some consideration.

OTOH, some of us knew that if you wanted to party and score with a girl, your best bet was to get invited to a party thrown by kids from any of the religious schools.

I want to keep my kids away from kids who think like you and your friends did as well as the alleged "religious" kids who throw those parties.

They were always the wildest kids, probably because that's where parents with money sent 'em when they started getting into trouble.

So it has little to do with religion or type of school.

 

[Jose Fly]

Well, other people have to live in a different world than you. Please show them some consideration.

Um......ok.

I want to keep my kids away from kids who think like you and your friends did as well as the alleged "religious" kids who throw those parties.

You don't trust your kids to make good decisions?

So it has little to do with religion or type of school.

Religion, not much. Type of school, definitely. As I said, parents with money and troubled kids almost always sent their kids to the religious schools, I guess figuring that the religious environment would straighten them out. Didn't always work that way.

 

[Buzzword]

Religion, not much. Type of school, definitely. As I said, parents with money and troubled kids almost always sent their kids to the religious schools, I guess figuring that the religious environment would straighten them out. Didn't always work that way.

A great illustration:

Saved! theatrical trailer

 

[Jose Fly]

A great illustration:

Saved! theatrical trailer

Hmmm....I may have to look for that.

 

[elohiym]

You don't trust your kids to make good decisions?

Nope.

You don't have any children, do you?

Religion, not much. Type of school, definitely. As I said, parents with money and troubled kids almost always sent their kids to the religious schools, I guess figuring that the religious environment would straighten them out. Didn't always work that way.

The kids that I knew growing up that attended the local Catholic school were hardly different than the kids attending the local public school.

 

[Tinark]

That's the point.... just because your uncle was a moron doesn't mean the government needs to interfere in the business of people who are NOT improperly homeschooling.

And how does one tell the difference between someone properly homeschooling and improperly homeschooling?

 

[Tinark]

I know a lot of homeschoolers and what is described in the OP is an extremely rare exception. I don't buy that fathers are selling their daughters is common practice among homeschoolers.

The problem is that homeschooling makes it much easier to hide abuse (for those whom are abusers - not saying it is typical). A kid going to public schools is seen by other adults and any obvious signs of abuse can be investigated and followed up upon.

 

[Tinark]

Far worse happens in a public school a million times over on any given day.

I mean really.... think about it.... while a homeschooler is typically winning the spelling bee or getting a scholarship to college the average public school kid is having a child out of wedlock and hooked on meth.

I don't think homeschoolers are the threat to society.

And what do you know of average public school kids? Do you form your opinions based entirely on media stories and anecdotes?

 

[Tinark]

I know full well. And your ideas about public school are often if not usually at odds with reality.

Maybe it's the idea that losing any kind of control over your child that unnerves people, or something. One way or another it's semi-pathological.

A lot of these Christian home-school parents are taught to believe that the teenage years are a myth constructed by secular society. The typical teenage behavior (interest in sex, drugs, rebellion) occurs because they were exposed to secular society and public schools and not brought up in a proper Godly™ household. They also believe that the teenage phase won't exist when brought up in such a Godly™ household.

Those who have teenagers with such a phase are then blamed for failing to properly bring them up.

 

[Lon]

Christian Homeschoolers Sell Daughter into Arranged Marriage, Give Discount Because She's "Damaged Goods"

And here we have yet another in the massive crowd of reasons for greater government oversight into homeschooling.

That you choose to educate your child instead of taking advantage of public education does NOT give you the right to lock them down and control their lives to this kind of Orwellian degree.

Forced marriages are against the law in the United States. Arranged marriages, of consenting adults, is permissible.

My own family has seen the dark side of homeschooling.
My uncle kept his three kids trapped at home for EIGHT YEARS under the guise of homeschooling, and because they lived in Oklahoma there was ZERO government oversight and ZERO accountability...and zero actual schooling going on.
No outside interaction allowed except with family, no Internet access, no TV.
All decisions made by Father, no discussion or disagreement allowed.
Any violations or seeming violations of Father's will were met with violent retribution.

The rest of the family was legally powerless to intervene.
Nothing changed until my oldest cousin turned 18 and attempted to physically leave the house, only to be assaulted by my uncle.
My cousin ended up stabbing him and nearly killing him.

A jury acquitted my cousin after the mountain of evidence of eight years' worth of repression and abuse came to light.
Now my uncle is sitting in a cell, but his children, though now adults, are all emotionally and developmentally stunted, to say nothing of traumatized.

Tragic, but you don't want to go the other way and require that the state monitor parents. We have rights 'until' we abuse them. In this case, the blame isn't on home-schooling, nothing of the kind. The abuse was strictly on the parent and we are never going to eradicate it, and certainly not by disallowing home-schooling or CPS coming to every home that does it.

We had recently, in WA state, CPS take children away from Christian parents because the parents refused to take their kids to a doctor after home-birth. There were some domestic arguing reasons for police to come into the home (yelling, nothing physical). There is a balance between government involvement vs. government intrusion, concerning basic rights.

While I think your family situation tragic, you as a family should have been more involved, rather than the government keeping tabs. I'm not casting blame, just saying I think there is a pecking order that needs to be followed. It isn't the fault of home-schooling.

-Lon

 

[Lon]

And how does one tell the difference between someone properly homeschooling and improperly homeschooling?

Or parenting....

The statistics for homeschoolers are overwhelmingly strong (do some Googling).

These exceptions are rare.

"Big Brother" isn't a good idea because it is expensive, it is invasive (ALL of us, not just some) and it wouldn't stop exceptions, regardless.

 

[Tinark]

Or parenting....

The statistics for homeschoolers are overwhelmingly strong (do some Googling).

These exceptions are rare.

"Big Brother" isn't a good idea because it is expensive, it is invasive (ALL of us, not just some) and it wouldn't stop exceptions, regardless.

If someone is an abusive parent (not a proper parent), the abuse is far more likely to be exposed by the adults and the kids the child interacts with at the public school. Not so for the homeschooler.

Do you think big brother is the only option to make sure obvious abuse of children isn't taking place?

Also, did you ever consider that the characteristics of the kids and the dedication of the parents might be a bit _different_ for homeschooled kids vs. public school kids? Is the data you are looking at removing this kind of selection bias when comparing the two groups? Meaning, that we'd need to know what differences, if any, exist between the kids who are homeschooled and their parents vs. those who are public schooled, and what effect those differences have on the data we are talking about, before we can draw conclusions.

 

[Lon]

If someone is an abusive parent (not a proper parent), the abuse is far more likely to be exposed by the adults and the kids the child interacts with at the public school. Not so for the homeschooler.

This is a 'guess' at best (school teacher).

There is no one more likely to see abuse than other family members first. When academic prowess is the result of home-schooling, trying to make it mandatory that all kids be educated in the public school system, would be seen as an abuse, an invasion of privacy, an infraction upon separation of church and state, and not a good decision when the problem is an exception to the rule (which it is).

The likelihood that my child will be shot and killed in a school-shooting drops to 0% if I homeschool :think:

 

[Tinark]

This is a 'guess' at best. There is no one more likely to see abuse than other family members first. When academic prowess is the result of home-schooling, trying to make it mandatory that all kids be educated in the public school system, would be seen as an abuse, an invasion of privacy, an infraction upon separation of church and state, and not a good decision when the problem is an exception to the rule (which it is).

Who said anything about making public school education mandatory? You are leaping to conclusions I do not hold.

I'm discussing the potential problems with homeschooling not suffered to a similar extent with public schooling. I'm not proposing any particular solution.

 

[elohiym]

And how does one tell the difference between someone properly homeschooling and improperly homeschooling?

Standardized testing.

Who is to blame when the public-schooled child fails those tests?

 

[Tinark]

Standardized testing.

Who is to blame when the public-schooled child fails those tests?

Who determines the standardized test? What criteria should be met on the standardized test to determine proper homeschooling and improper homeschooling?

 

[Lon]

Who said anything about making public school education mandatory? You are leaping to conclusions I do not hold.

Sorry,

...abuse is far more likely to be exposed by the adults and the kids the child interacts with at the public school.

I heard quacking, somebody yelled "Duck!" and I shot.

I'm discussing the potential problems with homeschooling not suffered to a similar extent with public schooling. I'm not proposing any particular solution.

The thread looks like anti-home-schooling propaganda, at least if it is done by Christians....

My gun is back on safety (no relation to Dick Cheney).