toldailytopic: When Mormons come to your door.

[Nathon Detroit]

The TheologyOnline.com TOPIC OF THE DAY for May 4th, 2010 10:48 AM

toldailytopic: When Mormons come to your door.

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[godrulz]

When the mentally challenged come to our door, we should show empathy and consider buying their chocolates if they are a credible charity.

If godrulz (me/'moron') comes to your door, consider inviting me in for fellowship, dialogue, your fine dining/cooking.

If Mormons (many of which are intelligent, but deceived by demon MORONi) come to your door, remember that no LDS missionary has been converted on their mission (they can barely go to the bathroom without their partner spying on them to keep each other out of trouble). If one is equipped, consider them a mission field at your doorstep. If you are vulnerable to be deceived (a good number of Mormons have come from our churches; cults are the unpaid bills of the church), be polite and tell them to scram or get some help for a future visit. They are slick and have a spirit of deception, so your/family soul is more important than letting them teach you or you trying to reach them.

 

[Granite]

This is when owning a pit bull comes in extremely handy.

 

[Nick M]

This when owning a pit bull comes in extremely handy.

You want your dog to bite you every time you come through the door?

 

[elohiym]

I tell them that I don't believe Joseph Smith was a true prophet.

 

[SaulToPaul 2]

I never answer the door. You don't have to answer, ya know.

 

[bybee]

Oh Boy!

Oh Boy!

The TheologyOnline.com TOPIC OF THE DAY for May 4th, 2010 10:48 AM

toldailytopic: When Mormons come to your door.

Take the topic above and run with it! Slice it, dice it, give us your general thoughts about it. Everyday there will be a new TOL Topic of the Day.
If you want to make suggestions for the Topic of the Day send a Tweet to @toldailytopic or @theologyonline or send it to us via Facebook.

I love this topic! (As you may well imagine!) When "they" com to my door I say Allow me to introduce myself. My name is Jose Imenez (or whatever strikes my fancy at the moment) and I am an Episcopalian. Would you like to drop to your knees and I will pray for you,
you miserable heathen. Jeepers! They don't like that so much. If "they" are foolish enough to persist I say "It is only going to go downhill from here so I suggest you leave!"
Once a "Moonie" accosted me as I was putting my groceries into my car. He started to speak and I said "Are you a follower of Sung Mung Flung Dung Moon?" He ( being a foreigner) replied yes. I replied "Ah so". I have no respect for leaders who advocate the destruction of the family! He says "Oh no not so." I say "Oh yes is so!" I will pray for you that you see the light of Jesus! Hallelujah! Amen and Amen! Well!!! His face went red. His eyes began to bulge and a bit of frothy spittle appeared at the corners of his mouth. He say "You no pray for me! I pray for you!" He started to come at me. I said "If you dare to touch me it will be your last touch as a man!" He clenched his fists and backed off. I leaped into my car and locked the doors quick. Good Lord why can't I be like other muling Christians and keep my mouth shut? Then I started to laugh! I believe God was laughing with me. I thought I heard a faint echo of "Well done my good and faithful servant!"
Anyway Knight, that is how I handle "them". bybee

 

[Nathon Detroit]

Stupid text messaging! I meant to type... when "Mormons" not "Morons", sorry about that.

 

[godrulz]

Stupid text messaging! I meant to type... when "Mormons" not "Morons", sorry about that.

Your nose is growing. I bet you have the power to change it (but don't bother...it leaves it more open-ended). We should also add JWs, since they are more likely to come to our door (I think Encyclopedia salesmen are extinct).

 

[gsweet]

Answer the door in the nude and the problem generally rectifies itself

 

[Son of Jack]

Answer the door in the nude and the problem generally rectifies itself

:jawdrop:



As to the OP, I always invite them in, break out my Greek NT, and keep them occupied for as long as I possibly can. The more time they spend with me the less time they have to try to convert someone else.

Same with morons as well.lain:

 

[death2impiety]

Last time Morons.. erm.. Mormons came to my door I politely told them that I already knew Jesus as my savior, thanked them for coming and lit them on fire.

 

[elohiym]

Stupid text messaging! I meant to type... when "Mormons" not "Morons", sorry about that.

I read it as morons, and my answer is the same.

 

[elohiym]

...I always invite them in, break out my Greek NT, and keep them occupied for as long as I possibly can. The more time they spend with me the less time they have to try to convert someone else...

:chuckle: That's what I do with JWs.

...only not in Greek.

A couple of times I saw the wheels turning in the heads of the junior evangelists, and that's when the leader said "time to go."

 

[nicholsmom]

I've never had Mormons at my door. There were a couple of them in an exercise class I once took. The one was proselytizing one day, telling us about a conversation she'd had with a bride: "When you marry, you will say 'until death parts us' - is that enough for you? Wouldn't you rather have eternity?" I couldn't keep quiet, so I mentioned to her that Jesus had said that there is no marriage in Heaven. She was aghast, having never heard that before. I resisted asking her if she had actually read her Bible, but instead told her the whole story and gave her an idea of where to find it. She went away that day very worried, but came back next time with the "answer" from her bishop :nono: Poor girl can't think for herself. The bishop, naturally, plucked the words of Jesus right out of context and proclaimed that you couldn't get married in Heaven, but if you already are married, you'd stay married. I had told her the whole story, and I'm fairly certain that she could read, but she accepted this twisted explanation from her bishop and avoided me from then on.

The other one didn't care about reason or even likelihood of error in her religion. She simply chose to be a Mormon whether she believed in it or not. It was very sad then when she had a child with a fatal disability - she had no God upon whom to lean, no well of peace, no source of joy. Made me very sad, and it calloused her.

I just follow their lead, knowing the Scriptures and the errors in their religion. They soon leave me alone, but I pray for them all the same.

 

[bybee]

Alas

Alas

Answer the door in the nude and the problem generally rectifies itself

The thing is my birthday suit was not sanforized. I'm just saying.... bybee

 

[Breathe]

I have been known to dig out, light and carry with me to the door a black candle, and put on an old black hooded robe from many Halloweens ago. They leave pretty quickly.

 

[mmstroud]

cults are the unpaid bills of the church

Hey, who said that? Is that a Walter Martin quote?

My sons usually answer the door and they are hilarious. My older son was home from college summer before last and had a lengthy dialog with a couple of young Mormons and then asked them to come for dinner. I couldn't believe they accepted, but they did and we fed them. Of course, there's no such thing as a free lunch (or dinner) so we waited until dinner was over and started asking them questions. I started by asking them what makes them do what they do, going door to door. Of course, we got around to the 'burning in the bosom' as their confirmation that 'Mormonism is true' and that 'Joseph Smith is a true prophet.' They asked my husband if he had sincerely prayed and asked God if Mormonism is true and if Joseph Smith is a true prophet. He told them he had and that God had said no to both. That was a actually a pretty funny moment. They told us that he didn't pray sincerely because that wouldn't have been the answer. :chuckle:

I usually take them directly to failed prophecies by their 'prophets'. That's when they give you a whole different definition of the word 'prophecy' ala Bill Clinton. With so much information about Mormonism available on the internet, the corporate heads have had to work double time to put out fires. Apparently, their scriptures can be fallible, as can their prophets. They were a little fuzzy on how you decide which to follow and which were just helpful suggestions...

My younger son always complains that Mormonism is just so stupid - how could anyone believe it? I usually answer him by explaining that many of them grew up in this belief system and it wouldn't occur to them that their parents and teachers in the church were lying. For one thing, I don't think a lot of them realize they are lying, although the higher you go in the organization, the more you have to question. As a result, I've had to play devil's advocate with my son, challenging his beliefs the way we challenge the Mormon's to see if he believes Christianity is true or if he just believes Mom and Dad. If I had to say which it is today, I'd lean toward saying he actually believes it's true.

 

[GuySmiley]

remember that no LDS missionary has been converted on their mission (they can barely go to the bathroom without their partner spying on them to keep each other out of trouble).

I know one who became an atheist during his mission, partly because of the tight control the church kept on him . . .

I've only had mormons come to my house once, while I was working in my front yard. One was a white kid and the other was a Samoan (I asked where they were from). The Samoan kid just wanted to talk about the Broncos since he noticed my T-shirt. The white kid seemed kind of annoyed by that and kept trying to stay on the Mormon topic but I had a nice conversation with the Samoan. lol Denver had a guy from Samoa playing for them at that time so the Broncos were popular in Samoa.

 

[BabyChristian]

Stupid text messaging! I meant to type... when "Mormons" not "Morons", sorry about that.

Me thinks your mistakes are not mistakes after all. :chuckle:

Answer the door in the nude and the problem generally rectifies itself

CHA?????!!!!!!!!!

Speak for you own body. :chuckle:

Not too long ago 3 of them came to my door, one being a young boy. I told them that, for one thing, Satan thought he was equal to God and that was what has caused this entire problem since Mormon males think they'll all be gods when they die, if they follow all of the rules and jump through all of the hoops. Meanwhile, the Mormon women, wives of those men, will be with the husband (if he so chooses, if he liked her on earth) and she will be eternally pregnant making spirit children. OH BOY! WHAT FUN TO BE ETERNALLY PREGNANT, populating their own worlds.

I looked down at the youngster and he was shaking his head yes. I'm sure his head bobbing in the yes gesture was noticed by the elders and he got himself a talking to.

I know so much about their religion (since I went to H.S. right near the Utah border) and have so much ammunition mentally and they can tell usually so they leave quickly.

Also Joseph had many prophecies that haven't come true and never will. I asked Sedlitz (not sure that's his name but he's Mormon) and he had excuses for why a certain town in Missouri hasn't become Zion as J.S. predicted (it would happen in one single life-time). He stated that this and that happened. I said back that this and that happened with the Jews too but in 1948 it came to pass that they went back home.

I do give them credit for doing more than most Christians do and both of our neighbors are Mormons and they're always bringing us stuff. They're very kind people since "works" is a huge part of their religion. If I didn't know so much about them, I think I'd lean towards their religion.