If one doesn’t have Love-heaven inside one can’t relate to Love-heaven outside. Christ teaches all how to install that heaven inside by laborious love-exercise. Faith in Christ makes one to obey his teachings. Then one gets that Love-heaven inside as I got, healing the hate-disintegration hell within.
I was born when Indian riots started during World War 2. Finally we had to leave our homeland as full scale mass murders by muslims made it impossible to live in Muslim dominated east Bengal. The murders and tortures on our Hindu community made me a mad hatter. This culture of hate weakened my integrity. Love unites and hate-pride breaks up. So I lost control of my mental faculties. That made me almost insane.
To search for integrity I went to many teachers of different religious. I even lived 3 years in a Hindu monastery fleeing from home at 12 years age. There I read Hindu scriptures. But I couldn’t get that integrity, rather degraded. At last I found Christ from a saintly catholic priest and was taught to pray to him. That stopped my mental degeneration and turmoil. I could study again. But that was palliative. Anyway I passed technical college and joined a catholic mission that has baptized me.
There I taught and operated the workshop. As I was taught, I prayed in the church and read holy lives of Christian saints as directed by spiritual guardians there. It gave me a peace of mind for limited time. But I couldn’t practice spiritual love there. It requires some freedom and maturity that I didn’t have there at that time. But, while reading gospel, one message “Love is God” struck me. Anyway I left that mission frustrated, to return to my Hindu home that was in fact atheist.
Parents’ suffering due to atrocities in the name of religion made them hate all religions and God concepts. But I knew God exists and I may know Him if I persevere. I almost lost faith in Christ temporarily, but regained it soon. I began to donate blood following Christ, as unemployed me had nothing else. Christ accepted it and I gained some integrity to pass job interviews in which I failed before.
I joined as a teacher in a polytechnic but didn’t join the local church as I rightly suspected that they shall misguide me. There I had full freedom to practice spiritual love though it was very much tainted. I sensed that long-searched for love-integrity is finally gaining in me. The resulting all-round improvements gave me some victories. But the Love-heaven I sought inside was still small. I prayed for Christ’s guidance nonstop.
Then Christ directed me to a higher spiritual love practice, loving enemy. So I moved to Islampur town to minister to the Muslims. There a heavy cross began to purify my carnal tainted love. Love-integrity heaven gained inside me more and more. That phase is still going on. Gaining Love-heaven is a long pilgrimage. When one gains a degree of Love-heaven inside that connects with that degree of Love-heaven in spiritual sphere. Nothing creative happens with a bang but progressively.
I was born when Indian riots started during World War 2. Finally we had to leave our homeland as full scale mass murders by muslims made it impossible to live in Muslim dominated east Bengal. The murders and tortures on our Hindu community made me a mad hatter. This culture of hate weakened my integrity. Love unites and hate-pride breaks up. So I lost control of my mental faculties. That made me almost insane.
To search for integrity I went to many teachers of different religious. I even lived 3 years in a Hindu monastery fleeing from home at 12 years age. There I read Hindu scriptures. But I couldn’t get that integrity, rather degraded. At last I found Christ from a saintly catholic priest and was taught to pray to him. That stopped my mental degeneration and turmoil. I could study again. But that was palliative. Anyway I passed technical college and joined a catholic mission that has baptized me.
There I taught and operated the workshop. As I was taught, I prayed in the church and read holy lives of Christian saints as directed by spiritual guardians there. It gave me a peace of mind for limited time. But I couldn’t practice spiritual love there. It requires some freedom and maturity that I didn’t have there at that time. But, while reading gospel, one message “Love is God” struck me. Anyway I left that mission frustrated, to return to my Hindu home that was in fact atheist.
Parents’ suffering due to atrocities in the name of religion made them hate all religions and God concepts. But I knew God exists and I may know Him if I persevere. I almost lost faith in Christ temporarily, but regained it soon. I began to donate blood following Christ, as unemployed me had nothing else. Christ accepted it and I gained some integrity to pass job interviews in which I failed before.
I joined as a teacher in a polytechnic but didn’t join the local church as I rightly suspected that they shall misguide me. There I had full freedom to practice spiritual love though it was very much tainted. I sensed that long-searched for love-integrity is finally gaining in me. The resulting all-round improvements gave me some victories. But the Love-heaven I sought inside was still small. I prayed for Christ’s guidance nonstop.
Then Christ directed me to a higher spiritual love practice, loving enemy. So I moved to Islampur town to minister to the Muslims. There a heavy cross began to purify my carnal tainted love. Love-integrity heaven gained inside me more and more. That phase is still going on. Gaining Love-heaven is a long pilgrimage. When one gains a degree of Love-heaven inside that connects with that degree of Love-heaven in spiritual sphere. Nothing creative happens with a bang but progressively.